Rather than paint the usual political familial pictures of Hillary the Hateful with Billy Sir-Lies-Alot and Chimpy McFlightsuit (not mine, but still hilarious) with his mute librarian wife, I thought I'd go for an 80s soap-style comedy routine.
What were the two most famous soaps running during that time? Dallas and Dynasty. Can't you see the two first couples as characters from those shows? Come on, work with me.
Dallas: The eldest son of a Texas tycoon, J.R. (as in Junior) is a greedy, scheming, cowboy hat-wearing oil baron*. Uh, W anyone? I can totally see Laura as his long-suffering wife clinking the ice in her never-ending glass of bourbon thinking "Why am I with this guy?" But instead of asking "Who killed JR?", we are asking "How many more has JR killed?"
Dynasty: You guessed it, the Clintons. The charming, silver-haired, short-tempered husband that was "ruthless in both business and family matters"* and the younger blonde wife that "found a hostile reception in the household"* (read: White House). I would pay to see Hillary with huge hair and shoulder pads...again. This is the show that had Krystle declaring she could "throw mud" too and the first on air use of the word "bitch"*.
I, of course, can't leave out our HOPEfully next first couple. The Obamas as, (I'm sorry, I had to) The Jeffersons. A nouveau riche African-American couple who were "Movin' on up"* (the political ladder, that is). One of the first programs to feature African-Americans in the lead roles and featured a mixed race couple (Barack's parents) in the plotline. I don't know about you, but I think if Barack ever called Mishelle anything close to "Weezie", he would regret it.
**All designated facts were taken from Wikipedia.
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